Friday, February 15, 2008


I've blogged before about the greatness of the original Mini-Wheats jingle (Miiiinnnniiiii WHEATS WHEATS WHEATS) and the subsequent mediocrity of the follow-up strawberry vanilla Mini-Wheats song. But now the franchise has totally fallen apart. The latest jingle is just Doo-Wah-Diddy-Diddy with different, Mini-Wheat-related lyrics. What a sad day. Has the toothpaste tube of creativity been completely squeezed out by the people at Kellogg's? Manfred Mann is spinning in the grave at seeing his song destroyed like so. Well, maybe not. For one, he's still alive. And second, maybe he loves Mini-Wheats. Maybe their combination is the culmination of a lifelong dream for, er, Mr. Mann.


[SCENE: Lou Bega's apartment. Lou is sitting on his couch eating from a can of Pringles, watching E! The phone rings.]

LOU: Hello?

PRODUCER: Hi there Mr. Bega, I'm a music producer for the new motion picture Fool's Gold. We'd like to use your song 'Tricky Tricky' in the ads for our movie.

LOU: [has Pringle halfway to mouth before freezing in shock]


LOU: I'm here! I'm here! Yeah, sure, you can use it!

PRODUCER: Great, I'll be in touch with your agent about the licensing rights.

LOU: You mean you want to pay me too?!

PRODUCER: Uh, of course.

LOU: Hot damn! [slams phone down] Hey Kenny! Some movie people want my song for a movie! They're going to call you!

VOICE OF KENNY[from outside]: That's great, Lou! Make sure they don't call when I'm at my shift at Burger King!

LOU: I'm back, baby, I'm back!

KENNY: Aw, dammit Lou, you clogged the toilet again! The plumber's bill is being added onto your rent!


Ok, so. Those Special K commercials with the 'vibrant' woman in the red dress, plus the dowdy Asian friend, plus the stereotypical gay guy? That same ad campaign is also used in Quebec, except in French and with different actors. No dubbing. Is this common practice? Can anyone living in and/or from Quebec confirm if there are other Anglo ad campaigns that have been Frenchisized?

There's no follow-up joke here. It's a legitimate question. Not everything on this blog is all whoopie cushions and guffaws.


You know that Kelsey's ad with the woman who looks like Anne Marie DiCicco who's stressed out at work, and she ends her rough day by unwinding at Kelsey's with her gang of friends? Does anyone else create an elaborate backstory between her and the guy in her group who looks like either Shane from Survivor: Exile Island or Brad Roberts from Crash Test Dummies? You know, they're co-workers who have a few too many drinks at Kelsey's and it leads to a one night stand, and then they halfheartedly date for a couple of months just in order to escape the shame and awkwardness that came with their one night of temptation, and even though they both sort of like the other, neither really sees it developing into anything serious, partially because he is still recovering from a painful divorce and she because she's just been jerked around too many times in the past to really believe that true love is possible, and they eventually split up with harsher words than they really meant, and they never speak to each other again outside of bitter small talk at the coffee machine, and thus future staff outings to Kelsey's become so tense that it eventually splits the office into two groups, one that continues to go to Kelsey's, and one that goes to Outback Steakhouse?

No? It's just my buddy Trev then? Alright.


I wonder if Kimmy Gibler from Full House ended up being attractive. Probably not.


RT Murphy said...

A better question might be if Stephanie from Full House is even still alive. Last I heard she was strung out on a bad meth habit.

Anonymous said...

Go Kimmie go!