Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Frankie Muniz Has a Mohawk?


Jesus, when did this happen? He looks like the drummer for an emo-punk band that I can't actually name since I'm too good to listen to such crappy music. He can't do this, he's Agent Cody Banks. That's not keeping with Cody's clean-cut image. Cody does wacky, family-friendly fighting moves like a jump punch. Mohawk Frankie hits you in the back of the head with a crowbar then curbs you until you die.

* Sex and the City won't translate well to the big screen. I'm not using 'big screen' in the colloquial sense, I mean literally, the faces of those increasingly old broads won't look good on a giant Cineplex wall. If you've seen the recent Sarah Jessica Parker fragrance ad playing in theatres you know what I mean. There were audible gasps from the audience during her first close-up. It was like a giant raccoon was wearing expensive shoes.

* So guess who's going to see Springsteen next month? THIS GUY. Did the early-morning lineup at Sunrise Records, and I was a little worried since it was my first time doing it at a Toronto location. Usually I'm in London at the Sunrise down on Dundas and it's no muss, no fuss. In TO, however, I had to scope out the proper location, and finally decided on Bloor/Yonge. Right in the heart and pancreas of the city. Standing in line is way preferable to going online, where you have to deal with server nonsense. I've only been successful once in getting tickets online, and computer mixups nearly cost me U2 tickets years ago.

Of course, my plan very nearly backfired when the Sunrise Ticketmaster computer froze up right when the tickets went on sale. That was great fun. Fortunately, I got a bit of luck from the always-ridiculous pre-sale draw. How it works is, everyone who is standing in line waiting for the Ticketmaster office to open has to draw a number. The winner of the draw becomes first in line and everyone else has to get behind. So if you've been there for two hours and the guy behind you wins the draw, you have to go back behind the last person in line. This is one of those ideas that theoretically works when you have a lineup of a few hundred people and you're trying to prevent people from sleeping over in front of the building overnight, but when you have a lineup of 20, it's just a real pain in the ass to the poor folks who got here a few minutes before everyone else. Now in my case, I happened to be third in line behind the guy who won the draw, so I was laughing all the way to the bank. Even better, the winner took off because the computer was taking too long, and the woman who was second in line left because no four-ticket blocks were available. So I was a virtual number one. I stepped right up and notched myself a pair of ducats for my second-ever Boss concert. My first show, back in 2002, was one of the best concerts I've ever seen in my life.

* Oh, okay, LISTAMANIA VI: MY FAVOURITE CONCERTS

10. Me, My Shower, London, March 2004

9. Sarah Harmer/Sarah Slean, Centennial Hall, London, September 2001

8. Radiohead, Centennial Hall, London, August 1997

7. U2, Air Canada Centre, Toronto, May 2001

6. White Stripes, Hershey Centre, Mississauga, November 2003

5. Bruce Springsteen, Air Canada Centre, Toronto, December 2002

4. Elton John, John Labatt Centre, London, September 2006

3. U2, Air Canada Centre, Toronto, September 2005

2. Pearl Jam, John Labatt Centre, London, September 2005

1. U2, Copps Coliseum, Hamilton, October 2001

3 comments:

RT Murphy said...

That Cody Banks turn-of-phrase was genius, comedy gold. You've been codified into the Actual Medical Facts of Science, sirrah.

Dallas said...

Though I loved sex and the city in its tv incarnation, I TOTALLY agree with you about how frightening SJP is these days. Those "Covet" ads are terrifying. I was reading some of the press releases for the launch of that fragrance (which doesn't smell very nice, by the way) and SJP was quoted as saying something like, "We wanted to capture a look of insanity, greed, and utter longing." I wonder if the goal was striking terror into the hearts of movie goers everywhere. I think I gasped audibly too. Who the hell took those photos?

Chad Nevett said...

Shuk, saw over on the 33 1/3 blog that the book on U2's Achtung Baby just came out. You probably knew that being up on all things U2, but figured I'd pass that info along just in case.