Friday, May 22, 2009

Fake Fighting, Real Fighting

A new PUNCH-OUT game?!?!?!

Holy shit, this looks AWESOME. I almost want to buy a Wii for this game alone. Will they get another heavyweight champion/future rapist to be the final opponent? Will it still be nigh-impossible to actually lose to Glass Joe? Has King Hippo somehow been elevated to main opponent, which doesn't seem to make sense given his simply weakness? Will the WVBA ever change their weight limit system so that Little Mac doesn't have to fight guys literally three times his size? Questions abound.


UFC 98 picks!

* Sean Sherk over Frank Edgar, decision
Not too much controversy here. Sherk is a big LW, Edgar is a small LW, and as we've seen from Edgar's fight with Gray Maynard, he has trouble with big LWs who can wrestle. Sherk gets a relatively easy win and Edgar is sent kicking and screaming to the WEC.

* Drew McFedries over Xavier Foupa-Pokam, R1, knockout.
Injuries stink, since they lead to fights like these that shouldn't be anywhere near a PPV main card. It should be at least entertaining while it lasts, as it promises to be a slugfest that McFedries (coin flip) wins. It's hard to pick against XFP's hilarious name, but there you have it.

* Dan Miller over Chael Sonnen, decision.
This could've been a big proving ground for Miller, as he was originally scheduled to fight top middleweight Yushin Okami before an injury put Okami on the shelf. Sonnen stepped in on short notice, but honestly, I've never thought much of Sonnen as a real contender. Miller shouldn't have much trouble putting him away.

* Matt Hughes over Matt Serra, TKO, R3
The big grudge match finally takes place at least a year after people stopped giving a damn about it. I dislike both fighters, so I'm hoping that they both one-punch each other in the first five seconds and get a double knockout. The rumor is that Hughes may retire after the fight, so I'll pick him to go off into the sunset victorious, since he's a legit Hall of Famer and Serra is just a loudmouth who won a reality show and landed a lucky punch.

* Phillipe Nover over Kyle Bradley, decision

* Krzysztof Soszynski over Andre Gusmao, R2, kimura

* George Roop over Dave Kaplan, R2, fight stopped after Kaplan either gives Roop a free shot and Roop knocks him the fuck out, or else Kaplan is too sick to continue after he realizes his team spiked his water with semen. I'm not even joking.

* Tim Hague over Patrick Barry, R2, TKO

* Yoshiyuki Yoshida over Brandon Wolff, R2, TKO

* Brock Larson over Mike Pyle, R1, submission

* Lyoto Machida over Rashad Evans, decision
This is a difficult fight to call. Both men are undefeated. Both men have difficult-to-figure styles. And, perhaps most importantly, both men are known for being somewhat dull to watch inside the cage. Seriously, I could see this being a five-round snoozer that would make the Anderson Silva-Thales Leites bout look like a thrill ride. The UFC has to be hoping that either Evans wins in order to set up the big grudge match with Rampage Jackson, or that Machida wins so impressively that they can actually market him to fans who currently think Machida = dull decisions. Rashad won't make the same dumb mistake that Thiago Silva did in just running at Machida and hoping for the best --- seriously, Thiago's gameplan for that fight was apparently taken from the Simpsons episode where Bart windmills his arms and goes after Lisa. In spite of Evans' discipline and the sure-to-be-interesting Greg Jackson game plan, I really don't see Evans finding a crack in Machida's armor. The title changes hands for the third time in as many LHW title bouts as the UFC desperately starts hoping that Rampage can figure out a way to put Machida down.

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