Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Random Nonsense

Though it's still just June, in what will surely score a high placement in the "link of the year" sweepstakes, here are 11 Houses That Look Like 'Game Of Thrones' Characters.  The Littlefinger one is particularly awesome.  This link is so funny that it's worth throwing off my blog's formatting to get the long image in there!  (Which, ironically, might be akin to infecting it with greyscale, so THANKS JORAH.)

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I picked the Blackhawks to win the Stanley Cup in my preseason predictions, and I picked the Lightning to win the Cup in my pre-playoff predictions.  Ergo, like Parker Lewis, I couldn’t lose.  Since correctly calling a champion eight months out is more impressive than calling one two months out, I’m more pleased that Chicago took it down.  You figure the Lightning have at least a couple more runs in them anyway, so they’ll be back for a Cup within the next couple of years. 

A couple of my fellow Leafs fans figured that Steven Stamkos is more likely to remain in Tampa Bay chasing that Stanley Cup, whereas if they’d won this year, he might’ve felt satisfied enough to check that off his bucket list and come play in Toronto for the ultimate goal of returning the Leafs to championship glory.  Yes, that was a perfectly plausible scenario in our minds….as opposed to, say, Stamkos realizing “why would I want to leave a Cup-winning team for gigantic losers?” and just remaining a Bolt for life.

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Speaking of Parker Lewis and myself, LeBron James also really couldn’t lose no matter how the NBA Finals ended up.  If Cleveland wins, he’s accomplished his major goal in his very first year back as a Cavalier and pulled off one of the great Finals upsets in history.  If Golden State wins, as they did, nobody blames LeBron since he was literally a one-man team out on the floor.  The fact that this motley crew of a Cleveland team actually came within two wins of a championship is a minor miracle.

Remember, the 2013-14 Cavaliers were a terrible team.  Their main offseason move was adding LeBron, which (no surprise) instantly got them back into the East’s playoff race.  But they weren’t really a truly good team until midseason trades for the likes of J.R. Smith, Iman Shumpert and Timofey Mozgov bolstered the roster.  With a bit more maneuvering, Cleveland can finally take the last step to becoming a true championship contender, though it’ll be difficult since they’re almost certainly going to be facing a salary cap crunch.  The easiest move is just to add as many quality bench guys as possible, and with the promise of playing with James and chasing a title, the Cavs have a shot at attracting some good veteran talent.  The other move is to ditch Kevin Love, as you can save the money earmarked of his max salary and spend it on more depth parts.  Love never really seemed to fit in with the rest of the Cavaliers, and while that mutual disdain might’ve actually helped fuel the roster to some extent (Love was the Adam “Cake Eater” Banks to the rest of the Cavaliers’ Mighty Ducks) it’s probably best for both parties if Love signs elsewhere in free agency.

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I’m starting to think that maybe, just MAYBE, Jordan Spieth is for real.  I mean, he had that tournament handed to him on a silver platter by Dustin Johnson but even still, when you have consecutive major wins before your 22nd birthday, it’s safe to say you’re awfully good.

My friend Kyle and I exchanged texts after the U.S. Open wondering if Kyle should make a wager with our Tiger-loving friend Misha over whether Spieth or Rory McIlroy (or both) would eventually surpass Tiger’s 14 majors.  I fully admit I’m buying into the hype here, but of the two, I’d say Spieth has the better chance.  Already it seems that Spieth has as well-rounded a game as anyone on the PGA Tour, in the sense that he seems to be able to compete on any course.  Rory is the same when he’s firing on all cylinders, yet he’s also just as likely to miss a cut if he doesn’t have his A-game.  Even for Tiger in his prime, there were certain courses you could predict he’d struggle on since they didn’t quite suit his game.  For Spieth, though, he kind of does everything pretty well — his only “weak” point is his driving distance, though he’s certainly long enough and if you’re doing everything else well, you can live with 10-20 yards fewer off the tee.

Anyway, check back on this post in five years time after Spieth’s career has totally collapsed and he’s living in a trailer behind a mini-putt course to see just how wrong I was in predicting he’d wind up with 15+ majors.

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Embedding isn't allowed for this link, but it's the Parks & Recreation gag reel for the final season.  The actual new bloopers don't start until around 17 minutes in, but you can certainly enjoy the 'greatest hits' of goofs from the previous six years.  Any excuse to show Chris Pratt's legendary Kim Kardashian joke, really.

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One of the unsung influences in my life is my seventh and eighth grade teacher, Mr. Aldington.  Nice guy, very good teacher, looked kind of like a real-life Inspector Gadget, LOVED Diet Coke (seriously, he probably ran through at least 4-5 cans per day) and perhaps most importantly, the guy who stressed the value of typing.  Back in my grade school days, computers were still rather a new thing, a sentence that makes me feel like an absolute caveman.  Yet ol' Mr. A was on the ball in getting us all into "computer class," which was essentially just teaching us proper typing technique.

And man, those lessons stay with me to this very day.  Typing is such a commonplace ability that you don't even really think about it...until you see someone who outright can't type.  Someone who is still hunting and pecking here in 2015 (thus making them the caveman).  This could've easily been me given my sausage-like fingers and overall clumsiness, but thanks to my early lessons and muscle memory drummed into me, I've managed to type like a boss (well, technically, like an assistant) for years.  Thanks, Mr. Aldington. 

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