Batman v Superman v My Patience

“Dawn Of Justice” tries to be so many movies all at once that maybe it’s not surprising that at least one of them is actually pretty good.  Yes, you heard it here first, folks…this film isn’t nearly as bad as the critics are saying.  The second half of the film, in fact, is very well done and is legitimately action-packed.  As absurd as the journey was in getting there, it’s admittedly pretty cool once you finally get around to Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman all joining forces to kick some ass.  Directing elaborate battle scenes is right in Zack Snyder’s wheelhouse, so given that basically the entire last 60-70 minutes is two huge fights, it really saves things.

The first half of the movie, however, when Snyder is trying to portray actual human conversations and ideas…yikes.  One of the worst 60-70 minutes of movie I’ve ever seen.  I can’t tell if the plot machinations required to have Batman and Superman actually facing off against each other were either too lengthy or completely unnecessary altogether.  This universe’s Bruce Wayne, you see, automatically assumes Superman is a threat based on the destruction the Supes/Zod battle in “Man Of Steel” left in its wake.  In a smarter filmmaker’s hands, this could actually be a clever way of addressing that movie’s glaring flaw of why Superman seemingly didn’t care about trashing half of Metropolis to beat Zod.  In, well, Snyder’s hands, the battle takes down a Wayne Foundation building and instantly turns Bruce against Superman.

This is where you could point out that Batman’s traditional comic book character is, of course, “The World’s Greatest Detective.”  You might note that Batman doesn’t actually do any *detecting* to confirm his hunch that Superman is bad news, he just immediately acts on it.  You also might infer that Bruce’s already-infamous “if there’s even a one percent chance he’s against us, we have to take it as a certainty” line is an example of TRULY LOUSY DETECTIVE WORK.  In the comics, Batman is certainly cautious and/or paranoid about his dealings with superhumans, yet he doesn’t jump to conclusions since comic book Batman is actually smart.  Snyder movie Batman, not so much.  Between this, Batman using guns and actually seemingly killing people, one wonders if Snyder has ever actually read a Batman comic before.  Anyway, my point is that since Batman is already anti-Superman, you didn’t need this elaborate setup on Lex Luthor’s part to pit them against each other.

So on the one hand you have Batman’s character being assassinated, and Superman (for the second straight film) having no character at all.  I still don’t know if Henry Cavill is a good actor or not since he’s given absolutely nothing to work with; we know BvS is wasting Amy Adams since we know what she’s capable of, though with Cavill, it’s a crapshoot.  I think Clark/Superman has less than 50 lines total in the entire movie.

And since we’re talking performances, ye gods, Jesse Eisenberg.  On paper, the idea of redoing Lex Luthor as a younger tech billionaire is not necessarily a bad one, and having Eisenberg in the role as kind of a Social Network spoof also isn’t bad.  In practice, this was a disaster.  Eisenberg is all the hell over the place with this part, kind of a poor man’s Jim Carrey Riddler reading a Wikipedia entry on god metaphors.  This is a career low for Eisenberg.  For the love of Zod, is it so difficult to do Lex Luthor properly on screen?  Gene Hackman made him a sleazy car salesman, Kevin Spacey made him Frank Underwood as a sleazy car salesman and now you have Eisenberg stinking it up.  This shouldn’t be so hard, people!

After all these critical paragraphs, I remind you that the movie isn’t half-bad.  Well, actually…it literally is half-bad.  If you sneak into a theatre at around the 75-minute mark, you should be fine.  You might get there in time to see the VERY ham-fisted references to the other Justice League members, though they weren’t really that bad.  In fact, the Justice League stuff as a whole was a strength with Gal Gadot pretty much nails it as Wonder Woman.  It’s not a stretch to say she was the highlight of the whole production.  Maybe it helps that this is the first time we’ve seen WW on the big screen, or that her comics history has been revamped so many times that she’s a blank slate characterization-wise, but it seemed to me like she came off by far the best of anyone in the movie.

Two more comments before I forget this movie ever existed…

* as someone who works in the journalism business, I’m pretty sure editors-in-chief of major city newspapers don’t walk around the office personally adding headlines to every story.  Perry White is a micro-manager.

* it amused me for some reason that Gotham and Metropolis were situated right across the bay from each other.  It reminded me of my favourite joke from Road House, which was that Dalton and Brad Wesley live literally about 100 yards away from each other, separated by a pond.  The comics universe is never totally clear on where both cities are “actually” located in their fictional America (both are kinda versions of New York, or there’s some thought that Gotham is in New Jersey and Metropolis is in Delaware), so I guess they might as well be neighbours.  Though, if they’re that close, you’d think Superman would’ve encountered Batman well before now.  Maybe that’s why Batman is really upset; Superman just flies over to Gotham and easily dispatches all the criminals, leaving Batman feeling upstaged. 

Batman: Here’s the Joker, he’s pure evil, he’s easily the most dangerous….
Superman: I just knocked him out cold with a flick of my finger.
Batman: :(

The Rejection List

As a thought experiment, I decided to compile a list of every woman I’ve ever asked out who has turned me down.  My buddies Trev and Eric were incredulous that I would do this yet what the hell, I like record-keeping.  Blame it on my interest in sports statistics; I would love it if there was somehow a Life-Reference.com database where you could search for stats from your life.  “How many times have I driven down this street?  How much money have I ever spent at McDonald’s in my life?  How many times have I worn this pair of boxer shorts?”

So as best as I can remember, I’ve unsuccessfully asked out 13 different women in my life.  Don’t worry — I’m not actually going to list their names or anything, I’m not a total madman.  Now, the number of unsuccessful ASKS is actually higher than the number of women since two of them I asked out twice.  The first was a girl in high school who I recall asking out in Grade 11 and then again in OAC/Grade 13, with her declining both times.  (I guess I figured two years would’ve changed her mind?  Apparently not.)  The second was a girl in university who I asked out to dinner twice, the second time because the first was phrased in a “hey, wanna grab a bite?” kind of way so I wasn’t sure if she thought it was just a casual invite rather than asking her out on a proper date.  Either way, no dice.

A few caveats to the list of 13….

* I’m only counting women I’ve actually asked out in person or knew in person and then asked out via Facebook or e-mail, not women I’ve asked out via online dating websites.  This is because a) I have no way of recalling that number and b) I don’t really ‘ask out’ many women online.  My initial messages to them usually end with some variation of “if you’re interested in chatting, let me know!” or something blandly casual.  As you might expect, this milquetoast opening usually doesn’t lead anywhere.

* the list doesn’t include women I’ve asked out on so-called casual invites that I was approaching as dates but they weren’t.  (Or maybe they were and just lost interest five minutes in, who knows.)  There have been a few occasions in my life when I’ve been interested in women but too shy to actually ask them out, so instead I see if they want to hang out or go to a movie or something with a casual, platonic, not-a-date vibe.  My logic here is that after a night of pleasant companionship with me, she’ll suddenly think “hey, this Mark guy is cool, I’m suddenly hugely attracted to him!”  This strategy, by the way, has never once worked.  The way it usually works is I “ask her out,” she says yes and I’m all excited until about 10 minutes into the outing when I suddenly realize “oh wait, she isn’t seeing this as a date whatsoever, dammit.”  In a way, this platonic ask-out is kind of a defence mechanism for me — obviously I like these women beyond just physical attraction and want to spend time with them anyway, so I might as well at least enjoy their company without the pressure of a date, especially if I don’t think they’re interested in me romantically.  I unfortunately know from personal experience (a few of those 13 names!) that it’s sometimes awkward to revert back to friendly hanging out after your failed attempt to ask them out is just lingering around like a 500-pound gorilla in the room.

So yeah, 13 times!  At least 13, as there could be a few more that I’m forgetting.  (For one of the women, I remember asking her out but I’m completely blanking on her actual name.  If you were the girl in my first-year English class who used to walk with me to philosophy class afterwards, help!  Who are you?)  I doubt I’ve suppressed the memory of any due to heartbreak, as on the plus side, all the rejections were at least done politely.  It’s not like I had hurt feelings or anything. 

I also acted like a gentleman and took the rejections with aplomb.  Now, my friend Dave has been spinning a lie for over 20 years now about one such rejection, so let’s get the record straight.  It was the last day of grade school and I finally got the nerve to ask out (arguably) the prettiest girl in school.  Let’s call her Yolanda.  I hung behind after class to ask Yolanda when it was just the two of us next to the hallway coat rack, and while quite visually surprised, she was nonetheless classy in declining my offer.  Ok, them’s the breaks.  So, since school was over, I went home via my usual route of running up the hill to my house, which overlooked the school and was conveniently just two minutes away on foot.

Now, to hear Dave tell it, my “run up the hill” was actually a run of shame.  Over time, Dave’s version of this story has evolved to include such theatrical elements as me immediately starting to cry as soon as Yolanda said no, then sprinting away while exaggeratedly wiping away the years in mid-run.  This account of the story is complete hogwash.  If you ever encounter Dave and he brings this up, you can rest assured that it’s all a giant lie.  If you need confirmation, just e-mail Yolanda.Incognito at Yahoogle.gov and she’ll tell you the whole thing.

The Funny Pages

All from this io9 post, "The 30 Funniest Single Panels In Comic Book History."  It is well worth the click, but here are some highlights...

Random Nonsense

“10 Cloverfield Lane” should go into the Hall of Fame for marketing.  Here’s a film that was developed completely independently of the original Cloverfield movie, and then I have to imagine the studio wondered how marketable a psychological drama with less-than-major stars would be, even in the shallow winter release schedule.  So a call to JJ Abrams and Matt Reeves later, and suddenly you have a pseudo-sequel to Cloverfield that (it should be said) has virtually nothing to do with the original movie, but gets some solid box office.  Well played, studio.

So in total?  Not a bad movie.  John Goodman is truly one of the most underrated actors around.  This film truly captures the horror involved in being trapped with Goodman in an underground bunker, since I’d imagine the Roseanne stories would have to get old after a while.

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Ok, so I was originally going to post this on Thursday when March Madness began, though it’s even funnier now.  Anyway, this segment of the post was going to be ‘my prediction to win the tournament,’ based around how my feeling about this year’s bracket was equal parts predicting a ton of upsets since it’s been such a rudderless year in college basketball, or just going chalk since I felt Kansas and Michigan State were such a cut above everyone else.  Ultimately, my pick was going to be Michigan State running the table to win the national championship.



Um….

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I don’t care for Peyton Manning.  I don’t care for Jimmy Fallon.  I only care for Kristen Wiig about two-thirds of the time.  And yet this video….good times.


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Some friends and I were recently debating about a modern update of Glengarry Glen Ross, which would essentially re-frame the story by casting younger actors instead of the middle-aged cast of the original movie.  (So the salesmen are all perhaps even more desperate to stay relevant since they faces decades of uncertainty if they come up short now.)  I was somewhat hampered by the fact that it’s been well over 20 years since I saw the original film version, though we all came up with Ryan Gosling in the Pacino role, Oscar Isaac in the Alec Baldwin role, Tobey Maguire in the Jack Lemmon role, Miles Teller in the Spacey role and Shia LaBeouf as almost anyone in the cast.  Come to think of it, Isaac or Teller could play many of these roles too.  I’m very open to suggestions for your ideal all-female version of Glengarry Glen Ross.

Amateur Dream Analysis

DREAM: I’m living in a fairly well-appointed townhouse, and everyone in the townhouse complex is having a building party.  (I say ‘building party’ since it’s one of those townhouse designs where all the buildings are connected around a little court.  Basically everyone’s got their front doors open and we’re all wandering around like it’s some massive potluck.)  It seems like we’re celebrating the fourth of July and there’s a vague southern twinge to the event, even though most of the people there are people I know from my hometown.  It’s like everyone I knew in London just up and decided to move, en masse, to suburban Atlanta. 

So it’s a very casual, laid-back good time happening when suddenly a woman catches my eye.  Her name is Heather, she looks like a cross between Zooey Deschanel and Terms Of Endearment-era Debra Winger, and we end up talking for “hours.”  Now, this is one of those dream-time things where it seemed like we said only a few words, yet time seemed to pass quickly and my buddy Trev (cameo!) mentioned that “wow, you guys have been over here for hours, what’s up?”  I’ll assume that Dream Trev’s watch was accurate.  Whatever the time, it was a very quick and intense feeling of instantly falling in love with this Heather.  We parted ways for a minute, which led to Trevor and (randomly) this guy Brian I went to high school with (and haven’t seen in at least a decade) taking me aside in a bedroom to implore me to go after her.  Brian’s exact words, said with as much wistfulness as possible, were “no regrets, man.  No regrets.”  So I leave the room, walk up to Heather as she’s drinking a Coke and say “wanna kiss?”  She does a spit-take all over the person next to her, who’s understandably annoyed, she quickly apologizes and then says “Sure!” to me.

The next stage of the dream has us leaving the party and seemingly being up all night at various other events, such as a) going to a bar, b) another apartment party held in (oddly) an apartment that’s completely empty aside from a single TV and a single couch and hosted by someone neither of us knew, and c) a special 5am theatre screening of some unnamed blockbuster movie.  My friend Matt was also inexplicably at this screening, and upon meeting Heather, instantly went into “let’s tell an embarrassing story from Mark’s past” mode.  She reacted with good humour, though I was annoyed.

And then I woke up.
 

ANALYSIS: In a nutshell, wow I’m lonely!  It’s been a bit of a dry spell for your ol’ pal Mark, so maybe this was my brain trying to boost my spirits.  And man, what a boost.  I’m not really a believer in the whole love-at-first-sight thing (the actual word for that is just “lust”) but man, who’s going to blame me for instantly falling in love with someone who looks like Zooey Deschanel and a young Debra Winger?  And combining those looks with someone is both apparently a fine conversationalist and has the comic timing for a perfect spit-take?  That is literally a dream girl.

The whole idea here was seemingly my subconscious giving me an impossibly romantic “first time we met” story, not to mention rather implausibly cramming every possible cute scenario into a single evening.  You can meet at a great party or meet at a crappy party, though doing both is overkill.  And I mean, a 5am movie screening?  That’s not plausible even for a Star Wars sequel.  Matt being there is also a curiosity since Matt isn’t a big moviegoer, and amongst my friends, he’s usually one to be respectful around all of our respective girlfriends (unless he had a few drinks in him, though who’d be going to a 5am screening drunk?  I’d assume that in such an event, you really want to see this movie and presumably would want to be sober to enjoy it.)

The southern U.S. locale was also unusual since literally nobody in the dream was southern.  Not even Heather.  I don’t really care for the south due to various factors (the heat, the long history of racism, the general ignorance, etc.) though I guess I appreciate the “southern hospitality” vibe.  So basically my dream stripped everything I don’t like about the south away and basically just made it into my hometown.  I’ll take it!

Brian’s cameo appearance was truly unusual.  As noted, I haven’t seen him in years and years, plus we were acquaintances at best in school.  Dream Brian said more words to me than actual Brian ever did, which is in no small part due to the fact that actual Brian never seemed to actually talk.  He was an incredibly quiet guy.  Maybe I subconsciously associated his not talking with “not expressing yourself” writ large, hence his impersonated plea for me to go for it.  Thanks for the advice, Dream Brian!

The townhouse complex was quite nice, and certainly the kind of place I'd like to live.  I wouldn't at all be a fan, however, of the random open-doors policy.  I don't want a bunch of more-or-less strangers hoofing through my living room, eating my food, using my bathroom.

Heather seems to be entirely a creation of my subconscious mind.  However, if you know a woman in her early-30’s that could pass for either Emma Greenway or Jessica Day, hook a brother up.

White Album

I love when you’re listening to an album for about the 50th time and yet all of a sudden, it sounds as fresh to your ears as it did on its initial experience.  Though I love “The Beatles” and consider it one of my so-called desert island records, I can totally understand the record’s most common criticisms….

* like every other double album in history, there’s definitely filler material that could’ve been excised in the name of making a single all-killer no-filler record.
* the record is remarkably unfocused in tone, be it in terms of lyrics, song quality, genre, whatever.  This probably isn’t surprising given that the band was going through a ton of internal angst during the recording sessions.
* along these same lines, it’s a very self-indulgent record — “Revolution #9” alone would qualify, but consider the sheer number of weird little nursery rhyme-ish tracks on this record that we don’t consider unusual anymore since we’ve had this album in our lives for almost 50 years.
* there’s almost a direct split between half actual songs and half little experiments or half-finished musical snippets

All of these criticisms are 100 percent valid and yet in a crazy way, these are also the album’s strengths.  The fact that the White Album is so musically all over the place is what makes it singularly awesome.  As noted, I’ve listened to this thing probably 50 times in my life yet I couldn’t tell you the track listing for the life of me.  I’m constantly going “oh yeah” as I listen through the songs, since I’ve forgotten that yet another great track is coming up.

This is unquestionably the greatest album ever made by five guys who were mostly screwing around.  I say “five guys” since if there was ever evidence that the late George Martin was a genius producer, this album was it.  I cannot imagine what it must’ve taken for Martin to somehow corral McCartney and Lennon at their most fractious, keep Harrison feeling involved and creatively included, keep Starr happy (Ringo famously quit the band for a couple of days during the sessions), sift through countless of hours of recorded music, adjust or live up to every crazy musical idea one of the lads had, and mix it all up into a cohesively non-cohesive album.

The Beatles will always hold the title of “greatest band ever,” in part because modern music has pretty much made the idea of ‘the band’ seem quaint and/or extinct.  If you stretch it to ‘greatest musical act ever’ to include solo artists too, the Beatles still win since I can’t fathom another scenario when the unquestioned most popular band in the world was ALSO probably the most innovative band in the world and ALSO probably the objectively best band in the world all at the same time.

Ranking the White Album’s tracks!

30. Revolution #9
29. Wild Honey Pie
28. Why Don’t We Do It In The Road?
* we now pass the ‘pointless garbage’ portion of our list and into the actual songs*
27. Piggies
26. The Continuing Story Of Bungalow Bill
25. Long Long
24. Yer Blues
23. Martha My Dear
22. Julia
21. Savoy Truffle
20. Sexy Sadie
19. Glass Onion 
18. Everybody’s Got Something To Hide Except Me And My Monkey
17. Good Night
16. Birthday
15. Dear Prudence
14. Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da (I feel like John Lennon’s ghost will kick my ass for ranking this ahead of ‘Julia’)
13. Mother Nature’s Son
12. Happiness Is A Warm Gun
11. I Will
10. Rocky Raccoon
9. While My Guitar Gently Weeps
8. Blackbird
7. Honey Pie
6. Cry Baby Cry
5. Revolution #1
4. I’m So Tired
3. Helter Skelter
2. Don’t Pass Me By
1. Back in the USSR

Encyclopedia Brown

Leroy "Encyclopedia" Brown had a troubled childhood.  The conceit of the series was that his dad, police chief for the town of Idaville, described his cases to his son at the dinner table every night, and Encyclopedia solved them.  Idaville, ergo, was known as the only municipality in America where criminals were always apprehended.

Chief Brown's actions raise a number of questions about his fitness as a parent. Though it seemed as if the only crimes that happened in Idaville were small-time robberies, there must've been a homicide, drug deal, child endangerment case, etc. at some point in the town's history.  I can infer that Chief Brown was sharp enough to handle some of this himself (Encyclopedia's detective instinct had to come from somewhere), but did the Chief also have a perfect batting average on the vice crimes?  Or did he rely on his son to solve these crimes too?  Did he have the coroner's report nearby, perhaps as a placemat, in case Encyclopedia needed to check the medical evidence?  Wouldn't this be rather unsuitable reading for a child (or really, anyone) at the dinner table?  "Wow Dad, based on the hooker's stomach contents, it looks like her last meal was a turkey sandwich and coffee."  "Speaking of meals, finish your goulash, son."

Idaville's status as a crime-free town had to be complete civic propaganda.  First of all, if someone jaywalked across the Idaville main street and wasn't ticketed, that's technically a crime.  That man is Idaville's greatest outlaw.  Second of all, the stories never indicated what happened after Encyclopedia solved the cases.  It's very possible that some of the culprits were found innocent in a court of law, especially given the esoteric nature of their arrests.  You'd think that a young boy's citation of the defendant's lack of knowledge about, hell, I dunno, a tropical bird might not be enough to erase any reasonable doubt in the jury's mind.  The Idaville DA must've had some tough trials, unless he came home at night and let his son (Penal Code Statutes Anderson, or something) write his closing remarks.  Maybe the entire town was full of incompetent adults propped up by their genius children working behind the scenes, a la Penny bailing out Inspector Gadget time after time.

Another problem with the Encyclopedia Brown series was the undercurrent of sexism.  Encyclopedia's partner/bodyguard in his detective agency was Sally Kimball, who was generally acknowledged as the smartest kid in town who wasn't a total shut-in to such an extent that he was actually nicknamed after an informational textbook.  While it was somewhat empowering that Sally was the muscle of the operation, her basic role was to act as the constantly befuddled Dr. Watson to Brown's Holmes.  Sally solved a case herself every once in a while, but the solution always had to do with etiquette and manners, which Encyclopedia (and, it should be noted, the male cops) were always baffled about.  The only men who seemed to know these rules of etiquette were, oddly enough, the male criminals.  So by author Donald J. Sobel's logic, real men didn't need to know manners --- it was the domain of women and lawbreakers.  

I remember the 'final' Encyclopedia Brown story very well, because it stood out as being extremely weird to my young mind.  In it, Encyclopedia and Sally basically end their friendship over the fact that Encyclopedia didn't invite Sally to a birthday sleepover because she was a girl.  This formed a bond between Encyclopedia and Bugs Meany, who had heretofore been the town bully, and suddenly it was the two of them paired up and Sally was the common foe.  It was just really bizarre.  I'm pretty sure Arthur Conan Doyle never wrote a story where Sherlock and Moriarty join forces against Dr. Watson.  This "Encyclopedia hates Sally" storyline took up the last half of the book, didn't even involve a mystery, and it was never resolved.  My theory is that Sobel was going through a divorce at the time, and used Sally as the stand-in for all of his hatred towards his ex-wife.  Maybe the real-life Sally got upset about Sobel's nights out with the boys, or she was "solving her own mystery" with another male friend.

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I'd love to see an updated version of the series called Wikipedia Brown, where he's just dead wrong about all of his solutions.

Brown: I've got it! The population of African elephants has tripled in the last six months, so that proves Bugs Meany stole the sneakers!
Sally: You're an idiot.

Trailer Time

"Hey, who are you, old man?"
"Old?  I'm only thirty-four!"
"Really?  Whoa."
"Anyway, I'm you from the future, 14-year-old Mark.  I bring news that in 20 years, there will be awesome trailers for both a new Ghostbusters AND a new basically-an-Avengers movie featuring Spider-Man released within a single week!"
"That's great, but...wait, you're me?  What the hell happened?  Where's my hair?"
"I've mastered time travel and you're complaining about being bald?"

History Of The Markademy Awards (updated)

I didn’t get a chance to comment on the Oscars since I was on vacation for a week but in a nutshell, yay Spotlight!  Admittedly, part of me was hoping Mad Max would somehow end up winning Best Picture in what would’ve been the upset of upsets.  Even though it was expected to do well in the technical categories, the fact that Mad Max swept almost *all* of them got me a little hopeful.  But hey, I’ll never complain when my #2 movie of the year ends up taking Best Picture.

It’s been three years since my last collection of Markademy Awards results, so it’s time for an update.  The criteria, cribbed from that last post….

“With this list, however, I (and you!) can check out my personal selections of the year's best films in one fell swoop.  While I've only been doing pre-Oscar movie posts since 2006, the previous years were filled in via my "Best Movies Of Our Lives" series with my pal Kyle that takes us back to 1981.  The list of the other nominees are in order of preference, so for instance Les Mis was my second favourite movie from 2012, Moonrise Kingdom my third, etc.

I've made a couple of minor adjustments to my rankings and changed a couple of winners overall, though for the most part, it's all the same as my original picks (and no new films were added that I've seen these the original posts were written years ago).  Some of the years had five "nominees" and others more, since I often shift between picking a set five and just listing every movie that I thought passed the post as 'great' as a nominee in my little personal contest.

Just as the actual Best Picture stands as a living record of "what were they thinking?!" decisions, I've decided to leave the Markademy Award as a snapshot of my mood at the time.  2001, 2000 and 1990 immediately leap to mind as years when I would 100 percent make my number two choice the winner instead, but hey, I need to stick to some harsh rules in my completely arbitrary posting system.”

As a bonus, I've also included my acting award winners for the last eight years, which is when I started to really specify who I felt should be winning those Oscars.

2015: Mad Max: Fury Road
Spotlight, The Martian, Anomalisa, Carol, Me And Earl And The Dying Girl, The Big Short
Acting awards: Brie Larson (Room), Paul Dano (Love & Mercy), Kristen Stewart (The Clouds Of Sils Maria), Sylvester Stallone (Creed)

2014: Birdman
Force Majeure, Edge Of Tomorrow, Boyhood, Captain America: The Winter Soldier
Acting awards: Rosamund Pike (Gone Girl), Chadwick Boseman (Get On Up), Tilda Swinton (Snowpiercer), JK Simmons (Whiplash)

2013: The Wolf Of Wall Street
Her, Short Term 12, 12 Years A Slave, All Is Lost, Gravity, Frances Ha
Acting awards: Cate Blanchett (Blue Jasmine), Leonardo DiCaprio (Wolf of Wall Street), Sally Hawkins (Blue Jasmine), Jonah Hill (Wolf of Wall Street)

2012: Life Of Pi
Les Miserables, Moonrise Kingdom, Cloud Atlas, Django Unchained
Acting awards: Marion Cotillard (Rust & Bone), Jack Black (Bernie), Anne Hathaway (Les Miserables), Samuel L. Jackson (Django Unchained)

2011: Midnight In Paris
Hugo, Bridesmaids, The Artist, A Separation, Young Adult
Acting awards: Michelle Williams (My Week With Marilyn), Leonardo DiCaprio (J. Edgar), Amy Ryan (Win Win), John Hawkes (Martha Marcy May Marlene)

2010: Exit Through The Gift Shop
The Social Network, Toy Story 3, Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, Inception, Winter's Bone, The Other Guys, Another Year
Acting awards: Natalie Portman (Black Swan), Colin Firth (The King's Speech), Marion Cotillard (Inception), John Hawkes (Winter's Bone)

2009: Inglourious Basterds
A Single Man, In The Loop, A Serious Man, I Love You Man, The Hurt Locker, The Fantastic Mr. Fox
Acting awards: Gabby Sidibe (Precious), Colin Firth (A Single Man), Julianne Moore (A Single Man), Christoph Waltz (Inglourious Basterds)

2008: The Dark Knight
The Wrestler, Slumdog Millionaire, Happy-Go-Lucky, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Stepbrothers
Acting awards: Sally Hawkins (Happy-Go-Lucky), Mickey Rourke (The Wrestler), Frances McDormand (Burn After Reading), Heath Ledger (The Dark Knight)

2007: Once
No Country For Old Men, Walk Hard, 3:10 To Yuma, Sweeney Todd, The Bourne Ultimatum, Hot Fuzz

2006: The Prestige
Pan's Labyrinth, Children Of Men, The Departed, A Prairie Home Companion

2005: Batman Begins
Good Night And Good Luck, Match Point, Sin City, The 40-Year-Old Virgin

2004: Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind
The Incredibles, Spider-Man II, Closer, Kill Bill (Part Two)

2003: Love Actually
21 Grams, Kill Bill (Part One), Bad Santa, Old School

2002: Talk To Her
Minority Report, Adaptation., Catch Me If You Can, The Bourne Identity,

2001: Memento
Amelie, Moulin Rouge, Ocean's Eleven, Zoolander

2000: Unbreakable
High Fidelity, Best In Show, Cast Away, Waydowntown

1999: The Talented Mr. Ripley
Galaxy Quest, Magnolia, Being John Malkovich, Three Kings, American Beauty, The Insider, Election, Sleepy Hollow, Office Space

1998: The Big Lebowski
Shakespeare In Love, A Simple Plan, Zero Effect, There's Something About Mary, Run Lola Run, Pleasantville

1997: Jackie Brown
L.A. Confidential, Titanic, Wag The Dog, Chasing Amy

1996: Fargo
Hamlet, Lone Star, The Rock, Kingpin

1995: Dead Man Walking
Apollo 13, Toy Story, Heat, The American President

1994: Pulp Fiction
Trois Couleurs: Red, The Shawshank Redemption, Speed, Dumb and Dumber, Trois Couleurs: White

1993: Short Cuts
Dazed & Confused, Groundhog Day, The Sandlot, Trois Couleurs: Blue, The Fugitive

1992: Unforgiven
A League Of Their Own, A Few Good Men, Noises Off, Wayne's World

1991: The Silence Of The Lambs
The Fisher King, Terminator 2, Beauty and the Beast, Defending Your Life

1990: Edward Scissorhands
Goodfellas, The Grifters, Back To The Future III, Miller's Crossing

1989: Indiana Jones & The Last Crusade
Do The Right Thing, Field Of Dreams, Jesus of Montreal, When Harry Met Sally, Batman, Back To The Future II, Road House

1988: A Fish Called Wanda
The Thin Blue Line, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Die Hard, The Naked Gun, The Last Temptation Of Christ, The Accidental Tourist, Rattle & Hum, Rain Man

1987: The Princess Bride
Planes Trains & Automobiles, Predator, Roxanne, The Last Emperor

1986: Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Platoon, Highlander, Big Trouble In Little China, The Fly

1985: Back To The Future
Fletch, Witness, Anne Of Green Gables, Clue

1984: Ghostbusters
This Is Spinal Tap, Stop Making Sense, The Muppets Take Manhattan, All Of Me

1983: The Dresser
A Christmas Story, Trading Places, Monty Python's Meaning Of Life, Never Say Never Again

1982: Tootsie
E.T., Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Rocky III

1981: Raiders Of The Lost Ark
Chariots Of Fire, Ragtime, Gallipoli, Blow Out

La Bamba and Conan

I have watched this about a dozen times in the last three days, and been left crying with laughter every time.  Conan is hilarious even when legitimately exasperated and confused.  God bless Richie "La Bamba" Rosenberg.